archive.tylerdave.com All the stuff from when Dave was actually called Tylerdave.

This morning I kept floating in and out of a dream where my cat was outside the bedroom window, scratching at the screen. Annoyed by all the scratching, I yelled, “shut the hell up!”

From outside the window I heard the reply, “aw man, I’m sorry.” Startled into half consciousness, I saw the source of the reply through the cracks of the blinds: A man on a ladder with a paint scraper, presumably preparing to paint around the window. By the time I went downstairs to see exactly what he was doing, he was gone.

About ten minutes after all this, I got a call from Chili’s asking if I could start my training today. So I’ll finally be working for the first time in six weeks, and I’m actually looking forward to it.

If you ever want to make Megan laugh Diet Pepsi out of her nose, just change the channel to TBN when Praise the Lord is on.

I just knew this picture had to be from Portland even before I read the caption.

In order to remember to bring my lunch to work with me, I’ve been clipping my keys to my lunch bag when I put it in the refrigerator in the evening. This method has worked very well.

Unfortunately, it’s also a good way to make sure you can’t find your keys when you’re already running late for work. You’d never think to look for them in the refrigerator.

You know you’ve stayed up too late playing with CSS when you catch yourself thinking “That soffit above the refrigerator would look better with a slightly bigger margin-bottom.” I wish I was making this up…

I was in a store recently and again saw Hanes resealable bag of socks that I mentioned before. Since we weren’t able to come up with a good reason for the bag being resealable, I contacted Hanes to ask.

Here was their (now seemingly obvious) response:

As heard on today’s edition of The World, there’s a humorously insightful column in The Village Voice about the Pentagon’s more intersting weapons developments.

Scroll down to the bottom of the page for more interesting weapons, such as ‘The Electrocuting Water Cannon‘.

This morning I put on a new pair of Hanes socks and I noticed the the bag they came in is resealable. The packaging even brags about the ‘New Resealable Bag.’ The question is: Why would you have any need to reseal a bag of new socks?

I wouldn’t normally post a link to such a bad (and very British) quiz but it was so strange to hear NPR’s Robert Siegel direct listeners to the Are You A Yob? quiz on the Guardian website that I just had to. The radio segment was about British Parliament considering extending pub hours past 11PM for the first time since WWII.

The quiz wouldn’t be too bad if it had some indication of the scale of the score.

Apparently I’m an 11, whatever that means.

There’s been stories in the news and on Slashdot recently about No More AOL CDs.com.

After reading them I thought to myself, ‘Huh, I haven’t gotten an AOL cd in a while…’

Guess what I got in the mail today?

A new issue of m@b (Matt B.) was released today and is available at his website. I’m not quite sure what, but something about his three-panel comics really strikes a chord with me. It’s as if he leaves the fourth panel undrawn, for the reader to come up with himself. No matter what does it, it’s funny. Check it out.

Megan and I frequent the Westlake Borders. I usually get a large coffee and browse through the computer books.

Tonight I picked up XPath and XPointer and Programming Web Services with SOAP (both by O’Reilly). I went to sit down in the music section but I ran into Megan on my way over there. She said the DVD section was being reorganized and that they were being loud about it so we went to find somewhere else to sit. We found a chair and adjacent table in the audiobooks section.

Megan sat in the chair and I sat on the table behind her. Megan tried to poke me to get my attention and in doing so almost knocked my coffee over. I moved the coffee closer to the back of the chair so she couldn’t reach it again. I got back to my book and read a couple of pages about XPath. I put the book down so I could look at the other one when I noticed on the shelf to my right a David Sedaris CD that was on sale. I leaned over to pick it up when I felt a strange warm then immediately burning sensation on my upper thigh. I jumped up to see the table (and O’Reilly books) covered in a thin layer of coffee. Thats when I noticed my shorts were soaked.

Megan ran to get napkins from the cafe area, I located an employee. He didn’t look to happy that he was the one I happened to find first. He was nice enough about it though and grabbed a towel to help clean up the mess. He kindly took the two books behind the main counter and filled out an inventory loss report for them. Megan and I slinked out of the store as quickly as possible.

It’s amazing how defeated one feels with a warm, wet backside in public.

From what Megan and I can figure, I must have put the coffee cup too close to the back of the chair. When she leaned over to ask me a question the cup got bumped. Because I was looking at the shelf I did not catch what was happening until it was too late.

The one good result of all this is that my car now has the subtle but distinct aroma of Columbian Roast inside.

This image is a scan of the back cover of a computer game published in 1997.

What did lawyers think was going to happen to the Internet?